Gritty Parents Foster Gritty Athletes and Children

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. We’ve all heard that one a million times, right? Well, how does the way we handle situations as parents affect our athletes…let’s explore!

First – lets dissect this idea of ‘Gritty’.

Gritty: Perseverance and passion for long-term goals. Grit entails working strenuously toward challenges, maintaining efforts and interest over years despite failure, adversity, and plateaus in progress. The gritty individual approaches achievement as a marathon; his or her advantage is stamina. Whereas disappointment or boredom signals to others that it is time to change trajectory and cut losses, the gritty individual stays the course.

When we work with our athletes in the classroom trying to understand their confidence level, we dig into the ‘why’ a ton! One of the most common responses we get as to what drives fear or anxiety in our athlete is “I don’t want to let my parents down”. Now, I’m sure that this is NONE of us, or myself even with a ten-year-old son, BUT, where are areas that I can ensure I am being a gritty mom to teach my son….

Responding to post game/practice attitude and dialogue. 

Undoubtedly, baseball and softball are failing sports that beat us down, game after game. We win 3 out of 10 at bats if we are top tier hitters. How do we help? PRAISE your athlete for the effort, their hustle, their response to a bad call at the plate. Sometimes as parents we must fake it to make it. Our son walked 6 kids straight his first time pitching, and when we asked him out it went, he told us “Coach said I hit my pitch count, but I think it went pretty well”. (A+ to this coaching staff BTW). It’s not always roses, but in this case, our son valued the experience, and we praised him for the determination and commitment to PROCESS versus the results! Ice cream after 6 walks and an awesome pump-up session in the car ride, let’s go!

Responding to an athlete’s frustration with their coach/teammates.

In a perfect world, our athletes all have great coaches and teammates who build them up every interaction they have. Sadly, we know this is not the norm in society these days. When your athlete comes home complaining or feeling like they are not being treated ‘fairly’ help them dissect the situation at their level! This is a wonderful opportunity to help your athlete with their communication skills, and most likely identify some areas of accountability in these situations! And….guess what, coaches do have ‘favorites’. Being married to a college coach for 15+ years, his favorite kids every single year share the same qualities - they show up early, stay late, outwork everyone, and are always huge culture contributors!

Making sure I am listening to his goals, not mine.

Playing college sports and running a sports training company, of course I’d love my son to find passion in sports. Sometimes so much so that I forget to listen and watch if he is enjoying it as much as I am! It's difficult to wait for your child to discover their own passion when it differs from yours. Let’s be real, if they aren’t playing ball 8 days a week when they are 7 how will they go pro? But seriously, let your kids be kids and encourage them to do what makes them tick! Our son is 10 and is playing local travel baseball for the first year amidst much pressure from society to start three years ago already! The change in who he is now versus a 7-year-old is astronomical and allowing him to grow at his own pace and do what HE loves has enabled him to be confident and even comfortable going against the grain from time to time!

Why does all this matter?

When we raise gritty athletes and children, we give them the tools to weather difficult situations that they will most certainly face their entire adult life! Grit is a LEARNED behavior, just like responding to adversity.

…And spoiler alert, having a gritty mentality as an athlete mayyyyy even lead to heightened performance on the diamond. 😉